Shannon @ 10:42:00 AM

Saturday, November 22, 2008

No time for anything

I miss a lot of things I used to so thoroughly enjoy.

Things like RPing, reading, making graphics, crocheting... I don't have time for most of that stuff anymore. I spend most of my time in class or doing homework and when I'm not doing that I'm trying to get away from the computer or my room and be with my friends. Not that my friends aren't entertaining, and I love them, but I miss doing those things.

I haven't found a good RP partner in ages. I miss Diego for that, I guess. I've been thinking about sending him an email lately, just to see how he was doing and all that. With the holidays coming up so fast it's got me thinking about him and whatnot.

I haven't been able to read for pleasure (AKA: something that isn't a text book or otherwise required for a class) in a long, long time. Every time I think about it, I'm either too busy or too tired... And I know that if I start reading I'll just fall asleep.

I lost my PSP9 on this computer, though I think it's got 8 on it. I just don't have the time to make graphics, or even do code anymore. Don't have much to be making graphics for anyways, I guess. New blog layouts, I s'pose... But that's about it.

As with everything else, I don't really have time to pick up my crocheting needle and yarn and just enjoy the rhythm it gets me into. I've seen spools of pretty yarn that I've wanted to buy and I just stop myself by saying that I don't have time to do it, so why waste the money on it?

In other news... I dunno. I just felt like writing, sort of procrastinating on my homework and whatnot which I'd really like to get through before the break. I've also got a lot of studying to do.

Oye vey.

1 in love...

Shannon @ 5:29:00 PM

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Oh, the weather outside is frightful...

I'm a bit lonely here.

I mean, I'm surrounded by a bajillion and five other people, but I'm lonely. I have my friends, and they're WONDERFUL, but I want something else. I want a boyfriend. Someone who I can kiss goodnight... And good morning. Someone who isn't a plane ride away but just a short walk. At this point I'd settle for Matt, even though he drives me crazy... I have feelings for him that I just can't explain, that I'm not sure anyone can really even understand. I'm not even sure I fully understand them. I just want someone who thinks I'm the most special thing in the world; someone who couldn't imagine how they lived before me.

Maybe that's a bit dramatic, a bit sappy... Even a bit scary. Maybe I don't want someone who's really that crazy. But I do want someone to be close to, emtotionally, physically if possible. I dunno. I always get lonely around this time, though - as the weather turns cold and it starts snowing I think about how much I'd like to go on a walk with someone, all bundled up in jackets and mittens, and just hold their hand. How I'd like to lay in a warm bed with them and just listen to them breathe, just watch them sleep... I dunno. The holidays always make me feel like this and they make me reminisce a lot; whether or not that's a good thing, I don't know.

In better news, I just figured out my life. For a bit I thought I wasn't going to be able to graduate on time (AKA after next year; and by 'graduate' I really and technically mean go to Florida) but I figured out what was wrong and it's all better now. As it is I could take a minimum of 13 credits my last semester here... But somehow I don't think I'm going to be doing that. xP I'll probably max it out around 16 or 17.

Other than that... I'm tired. And I want to sleep.

Maybe I'll take a nap.

0 in love...

Shannon @ 11:56:00 PM

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Updateeeeee...

So, firstly: I suck at concentrating. Especially on studying. I hate studying with a burning passion more aggressive than... Well, a lot of things. It's just so... Boring. And dumb. Especially when I don't have any idea how to study for something - like a biology lab test. I mean, wtf? Since when did labs come with tests. Ridiculousness.

Secondly: Things have changed in my life recently, mostly starting this weekend awkwardly enough. Broke up with someone I'd been dating since September... He was a nice enough guy, I s'pose, but things weren't working anymore. He had a great number of different views from me (including points on politics, race, gender, etc) and that wouldn't be so bad if he wasn't so vocal and forceful about them. We also just grew apart and I didn't feel like I had the proper amount of time to give to him.

Matt also started talking to me again... Said he broke his leg at work. I'm thinking about taking a train in January from home to see him and then leaving directly from the city to go back to school (I have to be here on the 16th). I still have to talk to him about it (I want to convince him to pay for half of it - it would be 45 dollars) and then I have to somehow sell the idea to my parentals... But, I guess my feelings on that is that I'll tell them that I'm going to visit a friend and, that really, I'm an adult now... As scary as that is and as much as I might want to retract that statement for a few other things, I am an adult, plain and simple. If it's my money and that's how I decide to spend it, I think I should be allowed. I feel bad leaving my vacation time early, but really... I'll be home for almost a month and they'll be at work most of the time anyways sooooooooo... Yeah. I dunno. It's still totally in the planning phase at this point.

I also need to save money for my internship this summer and even for Florida... I can't believe how fast it's all coming up. I think I'm doing an internship this summer in Florida (Sanibel Island) with a rehabilitation clinic... It looks so awesome. $200 for a month of stay, you just have to buy food and transport there/back... Which, obviously is going to be sort of expensive, but still. Loans, I guess. Or something. Oye. Florida is only a year and a half away... That is the scariest thing. I can't believe how close it is. Actually, I don't know if I'm going to finish in time because of the amount of classes I have to take. I really need to talk to my advisor... Makesure things are working out properly.

I'm tutoring in General Chemistry now (111/212) for money... I needed some sort of income, even if it was generally minimal. For now I get $7.15 a hour and am tutoring four hours a week (I requested up to 10, seeing as I can't get more than that because of being a RA) but at least it's something. I needed something.

Other than that... I've been doing an AMAZING job going to the gym on a regular basis and working out for about a hour each time... So exciting. I can't weigh myself while I'm here (accidentally left the scale at home; I'll be getting it when I go home next week) but that's alright... We'll see where I'm at when I go home, I s'pose.

Other things in life are... Well, things, I guess. Nothing amazing or terrible on any side of the coin, really.

Now, lets see if I can focus at all...